Being Human
by Kirishtu
Summary: Feeling abandoned by Dib, Zim decides to get back at him in a different way. But Zim being Zim, no matter how careful, there's always something that goes wrong. ZADR
1. Chapter 1

Extra Disclaimer - I haven't watched Invader Zim in a loooong time. Which means, I hardly remember how the characters are supposed to act. So I'm sure there's bound to be moments of OOC-ness for at least three of the characters in here, but... I had fun writing it anyway. I hope you have fun reading it.

**One** – Dib's POV

You never realize how much you miss something once it's gone from your life. Since we first met, what, six years ago now, we'd been at each other's throats, always trying to one-up the other, to prove who was better, smarter, faster. As we got older, the fights became less about competition and more about fun. To see if we could. I wondered when our enemy status had become friend status. Wondered when the end of a battle would culminate with us sitting together on someone's roof, sharing a case of soda and watching the oblivious city. I never thought our lives would become so routine that when something momentous happened, it would be emotionally shattering.

"So you're really going." Zim said in a monotone.

"Yeah." I replied lamely. "…It isn't so bad. I can come home on breaks, on weekends." I sounded lame even to my own ears. Zim's red eyes closed slightly and I knew he'd heard the lameness too. "I can't stay here forever, Zim. The real world is fucked up, sure, but it's still the real world."

"You're a genius. You don't need college."

"Did you just compliment me?" I asked, smirking.

He bared his teeth. "You're not smarter than me."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Look," I said, "I can't keep putting this off like I have been. My dad isn't as oblivious as he was when we were kids. Gaz got an internship testing video games, so I'm the only one home. If I don't go to college, Dad's gonna get suspicious. And if he finds out about out about you, we're both dead."

I could tell from Zim's expression he wasn't buying it. I had started applying to colleges the moment I got my SATs back. I didn't know if it was because deep down I just wanted to get away from this stupid city and Zim, or if it was really what I wanted to do. Maybe both. A degree in engineering, physics, aeronautics, and astronomy would definitely give me an advantage over my Irken enemy, but now it all seemed so pointless. We both knew the Irken invasion wasn't coming. We both knew Zim wasn't leaving Earth. We both knew our battles to save and/or end the oblivious planet were simply because we had nothing better to do. After all, our school didn't care about grades or the crazy shit that happened that should've put a normal school on lockdown. I wondered if Zim even understood the concept of 'normal'.

"Well, what am I supposed to do while you're gone?" he asked me. I studied him out of the corner of my eye. It hadn't taken Zim long to figure out that humans matured over the years. I mean, he watched me go from four feet tall to six feet seven inches, never mind the fact puberty reared its ugly head both in me and Gaz. Besides that, people actually started to question why there was an eleven year old kid starting ninth grade. It didn't take Zim long to figure out a way to go from three feet tall to five nine. He was lanky, skinny, but he could still bend a steel rebar clear in half. I kept my hair short as a rule; Zim acquired a black wig from somewhere that was made of long, soft, synthetic hair so it could hide his antennae better. He even upgraded his ocular implants, which made my eyes hurt when I thought about it. I like my glasses, thanks.

"I don't know." I replied finally. "What is it you normally do when I'm not around?"

There was the sound of crunching metal and the shingles beneath him became dark with soda. He glowered at me a second later. "What can I do?" he snapped. "There's nothing for me _to_ do!"

I stared at him for a while. "Are you seriously _that_ upset about it?" I asked, incredulous.

Zim sputtered. "You're the only filthy human I feel like dealing with."

"You could always go exploring the universe."

"Dib, shut up." Zim growled. Then he straightened a moment later. "I could go with you!" he said excitedly.

I felt my jaw drop open in surprise. "And what would you do, Zim?" I asked, unsure of how to feel at his declaration. "It's not like I'd have as much free time as I do now. Besides, there's no way you could get away with everything you've been getting away so far."

"So you're saying I can't hack the system at this college of yours?"

"No." I sighed, rubbing my temples. "Zim, the school isn't like those here. I've been to it. People actually ask questions there." It had been bad enough with my father there. His big name and accomplishments hadn't made the dean bat an eye. I'd been accepted on my merits and grades, not because of my bloodline. "No, Zim, you can't go with me."

He stood abruptly and glared down at me. "So you're just abandoning me to this filthy human cesspool?"

I gaped. My god, Gaz had been right. When I'd told her what I'd intended to do she'd given me one of those superior looks and said, "You know, Zim's gonna blow a gasket. You and him, you're like attached at the hip. Is he why you've never had a girlfriend?" I'd hit her hard for that one. She'd punched me so hard I had a black eye for nearly a month. I watched Zim fume for a minute longer.

"I'm not abandoning you to anything. I'm just saying I'm going and you can't go with me."

"Bullshit, Dib. You're just running away!"

I stood and towered over Zim, and I saw the loathing in his eyes at that. He could never stand the fact he was short. "Look," I snapped, "I'm not abandoning you. If I were to do that, I wouldn't have even told you I was leaving! It's not like I'll be gone forever. I'll be coming back. You can survive a semester without me. Play with GIR or something." He glared at me, red eyes smoldering. I was sure he wanted to murder me at this point. "Zim, we're friends, aren't we?" I asked. "I don't abandon my friends."

He stiffened and his pale skin turned paler. "We aren't friends." He snapped. "We were never _friends_."

I stood there, unsure of how to respond. He folded his arms over his chest and gave me a look of superiority. He always managed to look that way, and it irritated me.

"So run away, Dib. Run away like a little girl. I'll just bide my time and destroy you when you least expect it."

"Zim, you're a complete, fucked up, bastard." I growled. I started for the side of the roof where it would be easier for me to jump down.

"Don't you walk away from me, Dib!" Zim yelled behind me.

"Well, you're certainly not making me want to stay and argue with you!" I snapped. I'd made it to the edge of the roof and was reaching for the ladder when something hard struck me right between the shoulders. I yelled as I lost my balance and started over the roof's edge. My fingers caught the gutter edge and a sharp, searing pain lanced through them, up my arm, and into my brain. For one instant I was weightless and then I crashed onto the front lawn on my back, all the breath forced out of me. I lay there stunned, my fingers numb, staring up at Zim, Zim's roof, and the distant sky above them.

"Dib?" I heard Zim calling. "Dib? Are you alive?"

_Who the hell dies in our stupid town, anyway?_ I wanted to scream at him, but I decided trying to breathe again was a better option than venting my anger at a xenophobic freak with height insecurities. I pushed myself up after a few moments and looked at my left hand. Blood, white bone, and lacerated flesh, sinew, and muscle were all that was left of my four fingers. There was no pain anymore, just numbness. If I'd never met Zim I'd probably be freaking out at an injury like this, but since I _had_ met Zim, it didn't faze me at all. I used my right hand as leverage to push myself up. My dad had machines that would make my hand as good as new. Food and sleep would help with the blood loss.

"Dib?" I heard Zim call. "Dib? _Dib_?!"

I started walking, ignoring him because I knew that would irritate him more than if I dignified him with a response. I heard him scrambling down off the roof to follow me, so I turned and flipped him the finger, still walking toward my house. He froze on his lawn, just staring at me. I couldn't bring myself to care. Tomorrow, I'd be starting a new chapter in my life, hopefully one without Zim. Still, I knew that was impossible, but a guy can dream, can't he?


	2. Chapter 2

**Two** – Zim's POV

He left me! That rotten, selfish, self-centered, filthy human bastard! I should've blasted him like I'd intended to instead of standing there like an inept monkey after he'd flipped me off. Instead I just watched him walk away, hand bleeding everywhere. I wanted to yell at him, but what good would it do? He was ignoring me, anyway. I went inside my house and went down to my lab. It was about the only place I could think of to vent my frustration since it was obvious to me that Dib was going to keep ignoring me even if I succeeded in blowing up the earth.

"Are you okay, master?" GIR asked me. I stared at him, not quite sure how to answer and not quite sure what white powdery substance was covering his mouth. I finally slumped in my chair and pulled off the wig I was wearing.

"I'm fine." I growled. I wanted to destroy something, blow something up, but I just couldn't make myself move. It was irritating. I'd been stuck on this dirtball of a planet for far too long. The Irken invasion wasn't coming. I was never getting off this backwater shithole. And to top it all off, my enemy was leaving for the "real world". "Maybe he's right." I sighed. "Maybe I can't fit in out there."

GIR made a whirring sound, then did a little jig until he had my full attention. He gave me a wide grin. "Master, you can do anything."

"GIR, sometimes your lack of intelligence makes you seem pretty smart." He grinned wider and danced away. I leaned back in my chair and propped my chin on my fist. I could fit in, couldn't I? I'd been doing it for seven years now, after all. A few adjustments were all I would have to make to look more human. Then I could go to this college place and Dib would never know.

…Yeah. I'm not obsessive or anything.

I turned to my computer and began typing away at the keys, imputing commands and rewriting codes. Most of the genetic data that I'd used to make me… taller… was still in the computer's database, so writing new codes for new modifications wasn't too difficult. It would hurt like a wicked bitch in heat, though. I modeled my new skeletal structure on a human's, making sure that everything would match. Five fingers, five toes, that sort of thing. All normal lengths, because I really didn't feel like coming up with a story as to why I had two stunted fingers on each hand. I'm not saying I couldn't. I could. It was just beneath my dignity. I made more adjustments and computations and it was after midnight when I was finally finished with every minute detail. For a while I just stared at my screen, pretending to study the numbers running along the images of what I was going to look like when this was over.

"Right," I said to myself, "let's get this over with." I pushed myself out of the chair, removed my PAK, and stepped into the sterilized alteration chamber I'd built.

As the clear hurricane-proof glass door hissed closed behind me, the second thoughts started popping into my head. I _was_ being obsessive. As much as I was loath to admit it, Dib was my friend. Him going away brought up a while slew of questions I didn't want to answer. But if I went through with this and followed him to this school, then he'd have no choice but to admit that I was better. Alternatively, it could go horribly, irreversibly wrong. I already figured out that if I succeeded in following Dib and he didn't recognize me, I couldn't just blow my cover. I'd have to pretend I was who I was saying I was. Which, admittedly, could be fun, because it would prove that I was a genius and Dib was an idiot.

"GIR!" I yelled. He was there in an instant, saluting me. "GIR, press the button."

"Yes, sir!" GIR shouted. I watched him toddle over to the keyboard and leap into my chair. He cracked his robot knuckles and I could swear a dark cloud of foreboding encircled his head. A shiver went down my spine. He raised his hands and brought them down as hard as he could on the button. I couldn't hold back the scream that ripped out of my throat as my bones snapped.

It took more than two hours before the entire process was finished. I could barely stand when the door hissed open. Steam gushed out in front of me as I stepped out onto the cold metal of my lab floor. Shakily I raised myself to my full height and looked down. Ten human toes. I wiggled them and I could feel the bones moving under my skin. I looked at my hands. Ten human fingers, all the correct lengths. I touched my face. Lips, human nose, eyes. I took a few steps forward and looked at my reflection on the black screen of my monitor. I was completely naked. _Well,_ I decided as my eyes traveled over my body. _I guess I won't be taking my clothes off._ It was obvious what I was lacking. Irken physiology didn't allow for an outside sex organ. We were clones, made in smeeteries beneath our planet's surface. Besides that, if you considered how much of a screw-up I was, that option would have been taken away from me right after I fucked up the first time, if Irkens still reproduced sexually. Besides lacking a human male organ, and having my PAK attached quasi-permanently to my spine, I looked like a normal human being, save for the red eyes, unnaturally pale skin, the bald head, and, oh yeah, the antennae growing out of my skull.

It made me realize something I really didn't want to admit.

I reached for the wig I'd left on my chair and put it on with my eyes closed. When I opened them, I gaped at my reflection. _I_ didn't even recognize myself.

"This is too awesome." I whispered to myself. I heard GIR clunking around behind me and turned to face him. "GIR!" I shouted to get his attention. "Do you recognize me?"

He stared at me for a while, jaw slack. Then his eyes went red so I had my answer. I ripped the wig off my head the moment GIR's weaponry came out. "GIR, it's me! Zim!"

"Oh." His eyes returned to normal and he blinked at me. "Master, you'd better be careful. There's an intruder!" He spun around and pranced out of my view. I just stared after him for a while, then shook myself. There was still much more to my plan, and for that I needed help. There. I admitted it. God help me, I needed Gaz.


	3. Chapter 3

**Three** – Zim's POV

Unlike her big brother, Gaz had gotten a well-paying job in the city designing and testing video games. It had gotten her out of her father's shadow and established her as an independent power in their family. She had her own apartment, which Dib had never seen (so he claimed). She was the one human I seemed to be able to get along with. Probably because she thought I was as much of an idiot as her older brother was. Whatever the reason, I figured I'd end up owing her big time, so I was prepared for the verbal assault no doubt waiting for me.

It wasn't hard to locate her office. The hard part was getting in. I was aware of the stares I was getting as I stood in the lobby waiting for Gaz. I mean, it's not every day you see a five-foot, greenish-skinned, red-eyed, black-haired human, so by the stares I could tell that these insects had some shred of intelligence.

I fought the urge to start tapping my foot and instead folded my arms over my chest and dug my new nails into the flesh of my arms, glowering at the floor and wondering how many ways I could cause spontaneous combustion in the humans watching me. Then she blew into the lobby like a solar storm and grabbed me by my wrist. "This better be important," Gaz growled at me as she dragged me toward the elevator.

"It is," I said. "Kind of."

She glared at me with enough intensity I should've burst into flames. Though she was a little past seventeen, she already looked the part of a female in her prime. Today, her hair was a ridiculous shade of purple-green. She'd pierced her lip a few years back, nearly sending her dad into an epileptic fit, so a small metal ring was currently looped over her bottom lip. Her eyes were shaded by purple and her lips were shaded black. Next to me, her lily-white skin looked tan.

"So what do you want, Zim?" she growled as the elevator door swooshed closed.

I took a breath. "I need your help."

"My what?"

"Help?"

"What for?"

"Getting even with Dib."

She gave me an arch look. "As much as I love torturing my brother, helping you get even with him is definitely _not_ going on my to do list."

"Gaz," I started to protest.

She shook her head. "Nope. You're on your own." The elevator door swooshed open to her floor and I had to hurry to follow her back to her office.

"Gaz, would you just listen?" I snapped when we'd reached her office.

She glowered at me and helped up her hand. "You have five seconds, and then I'm calling security."

"But–"

"Four seconds."

"You bitch."

"Yep. Three seconds."

I took a shuddering breath to control my anger and then told her everything in one huge breath. Judging by the way she was staring at me thoughtfully, I was either about to be murdered or she was considering helping me. I figured it was the former.

"Okay." She said at last.

I blinked. "'Okay'?" I repeated, a little dumbfounded.

"Okay. Yeah, I'll help you. You have no skills when it comes to interacting with young adult humans."

I narrowed my eyes at her. "What does that mean?"

"Do you even know what college students do, Zim?"

I opened my mouth to answer. But I didn't have a retort. I couldn't argue with her at all. So I closed my mouth and sighed. "No."

"And do you even have an idea of what major you want?"

"Major?"

"I suppose you could go in undeclared, but I wouldn't recommend it." She plopped down into her huge leather chair and turned on her computer. I hurried around her desk to join her.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Dib thinks he's the only genius in our family, thinks I can't do anything but be a bitch–"

"You _are_ a bitch."

"Do you want my help or not?" Gaz glowered at me and I held up my hands. She turned her attention back to her computer and I let out a quiet sigh of relief. "I'm hacking his school's mainframe. We're going to make you a student there."

"Great." I said dryly. "A student for what?"

"I'm sure you thought along the same lines – if you can successfully sneak into the school, hell, successfully befriend my brother without giving yourself away until the end of the game, he'll have no choice but to acknowledge our skills."

"'Our', huh?"

"Well, you came to me for a reason, and I don't think you're stupid."

I honestly didn't know how to respond to that. "You used to." I finally said.

"I thought both of you were royal fucktards for the shit you guys did back then," Gaz looked at me, a grin on her face, "but I didn't think you were lacking in intelligence."

"I think that's a compliment."

"Whatever." Gaz typed away at the keys and returned her attention to the screen. The silence stretched between us as she typed. Multiple windows opened and closed as Gaz typed codes into her computer. Finally a window opened that listed more names than I'd ever seen in my life. "We're in." Gaz said, cracking her knuckles. "Okay, first, let's create your schedule."

"Schedule?"

"Please don't tell me you were seriously planning to go there and just pretend to belong there?" Gaz gave me an arch look and I looked away, unable to meet her gaze. "Whatever." She said at last. "Let's see. Giving you all the same classes as my brother would be stupid. I don't think you'd be able to contain yourself."

"You don't know what I'm capable of." I grumbled.

"Don't I?"

A shiver crawled over my skin from the deliverance of those two words. "Just… just don't give me something stupid." I didn't quite beg, but judging by the smirk on her face, she heard the tone in my voice.

"SAT scores… above normal. Ah, here we go, advanced placement chemistry, and English lit. Your major will be… history."

"History?" I asked. "Why that?"

"Because you're a dumbass, that's why." Gaz typed a few more letters and sat back to admire her handiwork. "There. These are your classes."

I leaned over her shoulder to peer at the screen. I had six classes: chemistry, calculus, world civilizations, English literature, American history, and Ancient history. I looked at Gaz. "I don't understand why you picked history for me."

"Call it an insurance policy." Gaz replied, folding her arms over her chest. "History can teach you all sorts of things. Strategy, warfare, intelligence. Dib never really paid much attention to strategy when he fought you. He only paid attention enough to beat you."

"So you're giving me an edge?"

"Only if you pay attention. Now, for your alias." She shoved me out of the way and resumed typing on her keyboard. "Here we go, freshmen directory. New student… perfect."

I hovered over her shoulder and watched words fly across the screen, codes, and pure text. Gaz was absolutely amazing, though I knew it stemmed from getting revenge on her brother.

"Do you have anything in particular you want me to say about you? Allergies? Like to water?" she grinned.

I planted my fist into the top of her head. "I'm not allergic to anything anymore." She punched me in the side in return. I doubled over, gasping.

"Fine. No allergies. Perfect health. Here's your physical. Thank god no one uses paper filing anymore." Gaz hummed as she typed away. Then she paused. "Shit," she said, "I forgot about your PAK."

I shrugged. "I can detach it while I'm out playing human. As long as no one messes with it while I'm away, I'll be fine."

"Alright. I guess you'll figure it out when you get there. You'll have a roommate, you know. Possibly more."

"I'll figure something out," I growled.

Gaz shrugged and returned her fingers to the keys. "Now, let's make you an ironclad persona. Because Dib is definitely going to check it out when he sees you."

"He's a paranoid fruitcake," I agreed.

"Zim, don't insult the fruitcake by equating it with Dib."

I shook my head and watched text appear on the screen. Birth certificate, parents' names, their income, high school record, middle school, elementary school – Gaz was being incredibly thorough and that thought scared me. I was beginning to think that she was starting to enjoy this way too much.

"Alright," she said after almost an hour of silence. "Now you just need a name."

I leaned to see the screen. I was supposed to be eighteen years old, originally from somewhere in the Midwest. My parents were both ambassadors to other countries, so they could never be reached, and I was an only child. She'd given me a life that would be easy to remember if I was ever questioned on it.

"I got it," Gaz said, snapping her fingers. She typed a name into the appropriate box and leaned back, grinning.

I read, "Zeke Isaiah Michaels." I stared at the screen for a long time before I slowly turned my gaze onto Gaz. "You realize those initials spell my real name, right?"

"Well, duh, dumbass. You can't have some ridiculous outlandish name. That'd give you a red flag in Dib's book. This is simple. Suave. Easy to remember."

"I hate you."

"Suck it." I watched as Gaz typed a few more things into the screen, more information she said I wasn't required to remember. I'd remember it anyway, once I stored all of the data in my PAK, which I was planning to do before I left her office. Then one minute detail made itself apparent to me.

"Gaz."

"Hm?"

"Who's paying for this?"

"Oh." An evil grin spread over her face. I swore her eyes glowed red and there was this black miasma roiling around her head. I held my ground, trying not to let the predator sense my fear. "I figure it's the least my dad can do." Gaz said airily. "He'll never notice anyway. He's too busy doing whatever to really notice where his money disappears off to anyway."

"Right," I let the word hang and watched Gaz put the finishing touches on my new identity. When the electronic files were on their merry way to the school's databanks, Gaz slowly swiveled her chair to face me. I stared at her, feeling a cold shiver start up my spine.

"Why are you staring at me like that?"

A slow smile spread across her lush lips. "It's time for a makeover, Zim, dear."

I'm pretty sure Mars could hear my scream.


	4. Chapter 4

**Four** – Dib's POV

I honestly didn't know what to expect as I loaded my car up that early morning. I kept glancing over my shoulder – even above me – for signs of Zim's presence, but he didn't show himself. That in itself scared the shit out of me. I didn't know what he had planned. He could've wired my car to blow, he could've hidden himself among the stuff I was taking with me, any number of possibilities reared their ugly bulbous heads as I packed my car. It was about two hours on the road that it hit me – I had actually gotten away from my rival unscathed. I almost had to pull over onto the side of the road because I was laughing so hard I was crying.

I was free.

I was free!

For once in my life I was free of that selfish psychotic bastard alien!

I think I scared the other drivers on the road because I had this huge, stupid grin on my face. Life, in this moment, was grand. It took me a little over six and a half hours to reach the university. It took me another hour to find my dorm building, a decent parking spot, and find my room. The door was already propped open, meaning my roommate was already there. And indeed he was. He was a little shorter than me with spiked blonde hair dyed a stupid shade of grass green. His skin was a dark brown, like he'd spent too much time in the sun.

"Uh," I stared, "hi. I'm Dib."

He glanced up at me from the suitcase he was unpacking. His eyes were a strange shade of violet, and I think his pupils were slitted like a cat's. I say I think because it was a split second between my quick assessment of his face and his wide grin.

"Hi!" he said cheerily. "I'm Lyse."

"Lice?" I asked, feeling that rock of foreboding drifting down to my stomach.

"No. Lie-Say." He smirked. "You're not the first to do that."

I forced a weak smile. "Where are you from?"

"Uh, everywhere. Military brat." He smiled. If it weren't for the fact I'd been living with Zim for the past half of my life, I never would've recognized the smile for what it was – a shield for hiding something. But Lyse wasn't setting off the same bells Zim would have, so I figured I'd give him the benefit of the doubt.

"Ah, cool," I said, smiling to try to put him at ease. "So did you just get here?"

"Yeah, I had to help my sister unpack her stuff though, so I'm a little behind."

"Sister?"

Lyse grimaced. "Yeah. She lives on the floor above us. You can't miss her."

I couldn't help the sympathetic smile that appeared. "I have a sister too. Younger. I know your pain."

"Seerah is older than me by a year." Lyse complained, "but she acts like she's younger. It pisses me off, 'cause our mom always treated her like she was God's gift to man."

"What about your dad?"

"He was always deployed somewhere doing things not fit to mention in polite company." Lyse shook his head and shrugged. "Anyway, where's your stuff? I took the left side. I hope you don't care."

I grinned. "Nah. Right was always my favorite side anyway."

"Hah hah, I see what you did there." Lyse smirked. "I'll help you. It always goes faster if you have help."

"Thanks." I said.

"Oh yeah, before I forget." Lyse handed me a key. "For the room. The RA gave me both of them."

I nodded and clipped my room key onto my keyring. "Thanks. You know, we might get along after all."

"Good. It'll make it so much easier to suck out your brains if you like me." I stared at Lyse for a moment. I have a nervous laugh. Lyse smiled. "Dude, you really are paranoid." He said. "Okay, no more jokes about brain suckers."

"Ah, no, it's okay." I stuttered, following him out of the room. "You just said it so seriously…"

"Isn't that how jokes are supposed to go? Seerah says I suck at human interaction. Comes from being addicted to stupid things like Big Foot, Nessie, ghosts." Lyse trailed off. "Moving around a lot, I didn't get to make many friends, and those I did get were into weird things."

My laugh this time wasn't so nervous or forced. "Hey, don't worry. I know exactly how you feel. And anyway, all those things are real."

Lyse gave me an unsure but game smile. I led him to my car, and we talked about said Big Foot, Nessie, and ghosts the entire time. I was surprised by how much he knew, though he kept repeating that it was all conjecture and his own thoughts and guesses. Most of those thoughts and guesses were dead on, and I wondered if he was part of the same secret society I belonged to. Lyse seemed too innocent for it, but then in my experience, it was better never to assume anything. When we finished unloading my car, I began to systematically put everything away in the drawers reserved for me. Lyse watched me, and our conversations continued. I found I liked him. Like me, he was going to be an engineering major, in hopes of one day joining his father in the military. He actually shared a few classes with me, so I figured it wouldn't be so bad.

At least I knew someone I could partner up with on a project.

"So, should we go explore campus?" Lyse said. "I'm kinda hungry."

I checked my watch and smiled. "Yeah. It's almost lunchtime, isn't it? I still need to see where all my classes are anyway."

Lyse jumped off his bed and grabbed up his keys. "Let's get started then."

We barely made it outside our dorm building when there was a feminine shriek. Lyse stiffened. I turned slightly and watched a young woman jog toward us. She was pretty, tall and leggy, with expressive lavender eyes framed by locks of hair dyed pink. It seemed like every space of her ears was pierced by some kind of metal and rings shone on every finger. There was even a ring on her right pinkie toe. Besides the open-faced sandals, she was wearing a long pleated skirt and a tank top that showed off her galaxy tattoo on her left shoulder.

"Dib," Lyse said dryly as the girl stopped before us. "This is my sister, Seerah. Seerah, this is Dib, my roommate."

Seerah studied my face. Like her brother, I got the feeling her pupils were slitted like a cat's, but it was there and gone before I could be sure. Finally she stuck out her hand. I took it cautiously. "Nice to meet you," I said.

"Nice to meet you, too," Seerah replied. Her voice was pleasant, not too high, and not too low. She flashed me a brilliant smile as she removed her hand from mine, then looked at her brother. "I'm glad I caught you. Are you heading for the cafeteria?"

"Yeah," Lyse said, "but, you know, guys only."

"Lyse, I'm gonna pretend you didn't say that, so I don't have to beat your ass in front of your roommate."

"See what I mean?" Lyse exclaimed to me. "She's like this all the time."

Seerah smiled at me. "If you don't want me to come, Dib, I can go on my own. I guess my brother wants you all to himself."

I saw Lyse's face flush crimson. I wanted to laugh but I figured that'd get me hurt somehow. So I shrugged and said, "I don't care. It'd be neat to talk to more than one person."

Lyse heaved a huge sigh. "Fine. Come on, princess."

Seerah smiled and stepped to my left side, opposite her brother. Together we walked toward the cafeteria, talking about the classes we were taking. Seerah was taking history courses with an emphasis on world and ancient civilizations.

"I've always been interested in other cultures." She explained. "I want to learn everything I can."

"Doesn't seem so hard," I said. "It's a lot, though."

"Yeah, but it's what I love. Besides, Lyse would have a fit if I was in even one of his classes."

"Damn straight," Lyse grumbled. I couldn't help but laugh. They were so different from Gaz and me it was refreshing. Even better, any thoughts of the alien I left behind were tossed right out of my head the moment I engaged Lyse in a conversation about physics.

Finally, here was someone I had something in common with, something we could both talk about without one party suddenly calling me a stupid Dib-monkey and immediately proclaiming the armada was going to annihilate my entire planet. Even better, Seerah listened and asked her own questions, where Gaz would've told me to shut up before denting my head. It was almost too good to be true.

"So, anyway," Lyse said, "it's pretty cool to know a friend right off."

I grinned. "Yeah, it is kinda cool."

Seerah smiled and said, "And fair's fair, Dib-meister. We've told you about us, so you have to tell us about you."

I pushed a slice of apple into my mouth to avoid answering right away. "Well," I said at last, "there's not much to know."

"Well, tell us anyway."

I just stared at Seerah until she smiled. "Well, my dad's kinda famous," I started, hedging a bit, "and my younger sister is a video game developer."

"And?"

"And what?"

"Don't you have friends? A girlfriend? Oh, I know!" Seerah snapped her fingers. "A boyfriend!"

I choked on my Snapple and Lyse quickly started slapping my back. "B-boyfriend?" I gasped out, righting my glasses. "I don't have a boyfriend!"

Seerah cupped her chin in her hand and studied my face. "Really? Because you seem like the kind of guy who doesn't stay single for long."

I felt the blush creeping up my neck. I didn't want to admit that I never had much of a sex life. It was kind of hard to get a girl (or guy for that matter), to stick around long enough to score a home run when you had an enemy who would vaporize said potential snog partner for the sake of continuing the little war we had between us. And even then, I just hadn't had the time to be interested, mostly because I was pretty sure there was always an imminent attack waiting for when I dropped my guard. I was just thankful Zim paused long enough to let me eat and use the bathroom. I finally shook my head. "No. I've always been a geek, into occult and other weird things like that, so the only girl that ever spoke to me was my sister, and she was usually threatening me in some way."

Seerah blinked, smiled, then shrugged. "Oh well. I guess that means you're free game."

"Would you please stop talking about me like I'm a piece of meat?"

"Oh, but you are." Seerah said, smiling. "You are a USDA prime choice cut of beefcake and I will not let such a thing go unrewarded."

"Don't listen to her." Lyse said blandly when I looked at him for help. "She was dropped on her head a few dozen times as a baby. There's no filter between brain and mouth."

I made a noise and turned my attention to the gelatinous mass of lime jell-o on my plate. I couldn't help the smile that forced its way onto my face then. For the first time in my life, I had two real friends that wouldn't end up on a missing persons poster and I was utterly free of Zim. For the first time in a long time, I could just relax and be normal. It was exhilarating.


	5. Chapter 5

**Five** – Zim POV

"I look like a freak."

"Good. You'll fit right in."

I looked at Gaz and frowned at her, contemplating shooting her, but then if I did that, I'd have no one to drive me to the college and I couldn't very well shoot the one person who was actually going out of her way to give me what I wanted. I sighed heavily and turned my attention to the side mirror of the car where I could see my reflection.

_This isn't a makeover._ I thought sourly. _I don't even _look_ like myself anymore._

True to her word, I'd gotten a full makeover. My wig was now sewn to my scalp, thanks to a "friend" of Gaz's that specialized in such things. And my skin… my skin was now a shade of brown with green tinting. I closed my eyes and shuddered. The same "friend" who had sewn the wig to my head had also decided I was too pale. Sickly. Gaz just grinned when she was told and stood aside when I was shoved into a tanning booth after my clothes had been ripped from my body. I rubbed my temple at the memory of the guy sizing up my naked ass, his eyes fixed on my lack of genitalia and saying, "Honey, don't worry about tucking. I've seen them all."

So what color does an Irken turn after he's been exposed to UV rays? Puke brown.

"Remember," Gaz said suddenly, "you're the one who wanted to do this."

"Yeah, yeah." I grumbled. I knew she was laughing, but I chose to ignore her. I stared at my reflection and wondered where I could hide the bodies. I watched the scenery change and realized I was on the college's campus. Gaz slowed her speed and turned onto a side street and pulled up to a large brick building.

"That is your dorm building," she said, turning off her car. "Do you need me to help you?"

"Help me do what?"

"Carry your shit."

"Go to hell."

"Already there." Gaz said with a cheerful smile. It unnerved the crap out of me. I got out of the care and started pulling out the suitcases Gaz had lent me to carry my new clothes, school supplies, and other equipment I thought I'd need. It really wasn't much to carry. I flipped her the finger (which was actually very satisfying) and she flipped me off before driving away, leaving me standing there, effectively stranded. Grumbling, I picked up my things and headed into my dorm building. My room was on the third floor, a spacious cube-shaped room with two beds. I got my key from the girl at the door, who introduced herself as the RA. It took all of my willower to stammer out a greeting that wasn't too like Zim. After all, I wasn't supposed to be Zim here. I was Zeke. I was human. I was…

"You my roomie?"

I dropped everything on the left side bed and spun to face the young man standing in the doorway. His skin was dark brown, not quite black. Glasses covered brown eyes, and a thick cloud of curly black hair ringed his face. For a moment, I thought I was staring at Dib.

_Human, idiot! You're supposed to be human!_ "Uh, y-yeah. H-hi. I'm Zeke." I stuck out my hand in the same way Gaz had taught me. The boy looked at my hand for a minute, then reached out to take my hand, giving it a slight squeeze.

"I'm Desmond. Nice to meet you, Zeke." He stepped into the room and put his things on the right side bed. He turned to look at me and smirked. "Are you blushing?"

"What? No!" I touched my cheek and glowered at the floor.

Desmond laughed. "Easy, Zeke. I'm teasing you."

A nervous laugh escaped my throat. "Oh."

"You're not my type, anyway."

"…What?"

Desmond smiled and said, "You're not my type."

"You… you're…"

"Yep." His lips twitched into a smile. "Does it bother you?"

"I don't really care who or what you humans like to mate with." I mumbled.

"You humans, huh?" I jerked and stared at Desmond. He was just standing there, smiling at me. Then he said, "So you don't consider yourself a part of the race that populates more of the world than is necessary? What are you, algae?"

I couldn't help it. I started to laugh. "Algae?" I asked when I finally had the breath. "What the hell? Do I look like a single cell organism to you?"

"Well, you're either some kid fresh off the polygamist compound or you're an extra-terrestrial." Desmond smiled. "Or you're insane. Still not my type, though."

I shook my head, trying to avoid giving away the fact that I was indeed an extra-terrestrial. "So what _is_ your type?" I asked, more for the sake of getting the conversation away from whether I was human or not than for the sake of satisfying my curiosity.

Desmond shrugged. "I dunno. I always figured I'd know it when I found it."

"So how do you know you're gay?"

"Because I kissed a girl and didn't like it."

I stared and gave a humorless laugh. "Because that's always how someone determines they bat for the other team."

Desmond grinned and shrugged. He turned to his things and began to unpack. I followed suit, trying to keep from being too suspicious. It took a little effort to pretend I was taking off a backpack when I really was removing my PAK, but I managed to succeed somehow. I decided I'd need to modify my PAK somehow, to make it less conspicuous if I was going to wander around campus with it. At least my roommate hadn't yet asked me about it. I wasn't sure I could lie convincingly enough to make him believe it was just some hi-tech backpack. The removal of the PAK was only a little uncomfortable. I could feel it detach from my brain stem and slide out from under my skin. I shivered at the loss of weight on my back and the feeling of impending doom. I needed this thing to survive, after all. If anything happened to it…

Well, I didn't want to think about it.

I put my PAK into my little closet with my clothes and other things, stepping back to survey my work. Desmond moved around the bed to the desk set against one wall, already unpacking his computer, printer, an assortment of wires, and other things. Something on his bed caught my attention. It was a long black case, made of hard plastic.

I jerked my thumb at it and asked, "You carrying a bazooka in there?"

Desmond chuckled. "Nah. It's my saxophone. I'm a music major." He plugged in the last wire and stood up, brushing off his hands as he moved back to the bed and opened up the case. A golden glow appeared first, but as my eyes adjusted the glow abated enough for me to make out the parts of the instrument.

Desmond patted it. "I've had this baby since middle school."

"I barely know how to play the recorder." I admitted lamely. Not that I'd really practiced any instrument that didn't deal with getting the upper hand on Dib and/or blowing up some planet or another. I wondered in that moment if, because of my genetic tampering, I'd created a new curiosity for things outside my knowledge. Or, I was just genuinely curious. I hoped it was a malfunction, but then, I was probably grasping at straws.

"Yeah, well," Desmond said with a smile, "some people are musically inclined, while others are better off focusing their energies elsewhere."

I glanced at him, wondering if I was severely underestimating the intelligence of my roommate. Finally, Desmond closed the saxophone case and turned to look at me. "You hungry?" he asked.

I blinked, then smirked. "Are you asking me out?" I teased, unable to help myself.

To Desmond's credit, he just grinned. "Maybe." He replied with a teasing note to his voice.

I finally shrugged. "Yeah, sure, fine."

"Great. So, do I get to know your name before our first date?"

"Zi- uh, Zeke." If he heard my slip he didn't indicate. it. He just smiled. I waited for something, some part of me tensing up at the silence. By now, Dib would've been shouting at me, freaking out to the point a blood vessel in his brain would no doubt explode under the pressure. But not Desmond. No, he just smiled and let the silence stand. Finally I moved toward the door, saying, "Well, let's go then."

"Right, right," Desmond followed me out, locking the door behind us.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. I didn't show it - no invader worth his title would _dare_ - but I couldn't help my traitorous thoughts as they bounced around in my head. Would I even be able to eat the food here? Irkens didn't have the same gastrointestinal structure as humans did. My skin only stopped reacting to earth water half a year ago. Still, that wasn't anywhere near worthwhile as far as evidence went. For all I knew, I was still screwed as far as certain foods went. I glanced at Desmond. "So," I ventured, "what's your family like?"

Desmond's smile lessened a bit and he looked toward his sneakers. "What's it like? The question should be what isn't it like. It's a three-ring circus most of the time. My mom works three jobs just to put food on the table and make sure my three little brothers have diapers and clean clothes. My grandmother somehow manages to pick up the slack. My older sisters, the two of them, still live at home with us. One's married with a kid on the way and the other goes to community college. I got lucky. Won a music scholarship." He smiled. "What's your family like?"

"Well," I started. I wasn't the best liar. Even GIR could tell when I was lying, and that was something that never boded well for my health. "I don't see my parents very much." I finally said, which was true, more or less. The fictional parents Gaz had imagined for me were supposed to be unreachable. As far as actual 'mother' went… I was a clone. I didn't really have much more information than that. I was a clone of some Irken who had long since passed out of mind and memory of my entire race. I was one of hundreds, meant for one thing and one thing only. "They're always off on some mission or something."

"Your parents are what? CIA? Black Ops?"

"Ambassadors."

"I think it'd score you more points if they were spies."

"Score more points with who?" I asked, frowning.

Desmond shrugged. "It makes you seem cooler. More mysterious."

"Or it makes me sound like a pretentious douchebag." My mind stuttered to a halt after the last syllable left my mouth. Inwardly, I groaned. I'd gotten better at using human vernacular over the long years on earth, but never in my life would I have thought Gaz had rubbed off on me. Those kind of words were words she'd use. Which meant I was either becoming more human or I was enjoying masquerading as a human. I felt disgusted with myself. I was here to prove a point to Dib-monkey, not lose myself in roleplaying and dress-up. Still it seemed that that was _exactly_what I was doing. And I think a poor innocent puppy just died somewhere, because, goddammit, I was having _fun_. I became aware of Desmond chuckling against hist fist, as if he was trying to hold back.

"What?" I snapped.

He just burst out laughing then. "Dude, I wish I had a mirror, because you should see the look on your face."

"…This is always how my face looks."

"No, no. You suddenly got this "Oh Jesus Christ, what have I _done_" look on your face and then you glared like someone just dropkicked your kitten."

I just stared at Desmond for a moment, then shrugged as nonchalantly as I could. "Well, you know, just thinking some disturbing thoughts."

"Such as?"

"You really don't wanna know."

Desmond just gave me a look and shrugged. We walked into the cafeteria, and were blasted by all sorts of sensory stimulation. Noise of voices, smell of food and drink (and people), the semi-oppressive atmosphere - it was a lot to take in and I ignored it all. I followed Desmond to the line and picked up a tray and silverware. There were too many things to choose from, ranging from unhealthy to healthy. I decided I'd go for the salad. I didn't trust the soups and there was no way I was going to get close to the hamburgers sitting under the heat lamps.

"That's all you're having?" Desmond asked, eyeing my plate of romaine lettuce, cherry tomatoes, cucumbers, parmesan cheese, and croutons all buried under balsamic vinaigrette dressing.

"Yeah," I replied. "So?"

"Are you a vegetarian?"

"Not really. I have a very sensitive digestive system."

Desmond just stared at me for a moment, then shrugged. I was glad he didn't press for an explanation. I wasn't sure how I'd explain it anyway.

The lunchroom was filled with people from almost every race, creed, gender, and then some. I took in the whole scene in the blink of an eye and suddenly I missed having my PAK because everything I saw here would've been recorded within it for future reference. Of course, logically speaking, it probably would've been more trouble than it was worth. I followed Desmond to a table and set down my tray. As I sat, I felt the back of my neck prickle. Surreptitiously, I looked around under pretense of looking for other imaginary friends. And then I saw him. Dib-monkey. Sitting with two humans, male and female, who closely resembled one another. At that precise moment, Dib happened to look up. His eyes found mine. I froze.


	6. Chapter 6

**Six** - Dib POV

I suddenly got the feeling I was being watched. It's a very annoying feeling, especially because I'd had that feeling far too much and far too often over the course of my lifetime. The hairs on the back of your neck prickle, you might even get a little shiver and get goosebumps, or your body may involuntarily tense. Since most of these happened to me, I knew I was being watched, and I hated it. I raised my head and looked around the dining hall. And that was when I saw him, a short, skinny kid with a sickly complexion, black hair styled in a messy tail, and reddish eyes. He froze the moment he realized I was staring at him, then hunched his shoulders and quickly averted his gaze as he sat down with his companion. I frowned, feeling as though I _knew_ that guy, but couldn't quite place him in my memory.

"Dib? You okay?" Lyse's voice finally broke through the "I'm in my own world" haze.

"Huh?" I responded. "Oh, yeah."

Lyse frowned a little. "You sure? 'Cause for a second there, you had this look on your face…"

I smiled, but it felt grim. "I'm good. Just people staring."

"Welcome to humanity." Seerah said before Lyse could say anything. "Everyone stares at everybody. And if it's funny, it ends up on YouTube."

I snickered. "YouTube, huh?"

"Well, it starts there and then could end up on the news or any show that bases its contents on clips scoured from the sweaty, stinky, nether regions of the internet."

I shook my head, grinning. Seerah shrugged and poked at her jello with her fork. "Besides," she continued, "there's staring and there's _staring_. People are bound to stare, especially in new environments. It's nerves, fear, the urge to want to get to know faces. But if someone is _staring_ then you, sir, might become the center of a stalking problem and therefore need to take the stare-er behind a building, beat the shit out of him, and dump him in a dumpster."

"Does that apply for girls, too?" Lyse asked far too innocently to be innocent.

Seerah snorted. "Brother of mine, if a girl is _staring_ at you it means one of two things: you either look like a creeper, or you're going to get laid."

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Does that apply to boys?" I asked.

She blinked at me, smiled, and reached over to pat my hand. "Dibby, a man's morning begins with the question "Am I gonna score today?" and his night ends with either a chick, a dude, or his hand."

I shook my head and tried not to snicker, despite the fact it probably would've come out as a pained whimper. Seerah probably would've taken it as an invitation of some kind. I craned my head back so I could look at the kid who'd been staring at me. His gaze was now focused on the food in front of him, and he probably would've been convicted of homicide by fork if salads could be murdered. His companion was just grinning, and I thought I could see a faint tinge of pink on otherwise sickly pale skin.

"Love at first sight?" Lyse whispered. I looked at him with a raised brow. He smiled. "You're staring at that guy pretty hard."

I shook my head. "He was staring at me. I thought I'd return the favor." Though, something about that guy was bothering me. I couldn't place my finger on it, so I didn't say anything about it to my friends. Something about that pale kid was familiar, somehow, and I didn't like that. The whole point of my coming to this school was to get away from the familiar, to get away from Zim, my father, and my sister. I didn't want anything to do with my old life during this time. Then I wondered if I was feeling the pangs of paranoid familiarity _because_ that kid had decided to look at me first in his scan of the room, and I happened to notice him looking at me. Maybe he was insecure and I just happened to make him more so because I'd stared right back at him. After all, not all of the country was like the people of my town, who were blissfully oblivious to the obvious and never noticed a damned thing, even when a giant flying pig was racing through the city sky.

I finally sighed quietly and started to rise.

"Dib? Where are you going?" Seerah asked.

I smiled at her and Lyse and nodded at the pale kid and his friend. "I thought I'd go over and say hi." I replied.

Seerah propped her chin on her fist and gave me a thumbs up. Lyse just shook his head. "Don't go traumatizing the local wildlife." he said.

"I'm not going to terrorize the wildlife." I replied cheerfully as I started toward the pale boy and his companion.

Upon approaching, I became aware of the pale kid's companion watching me from behind the dark rimmed glasses he wore. I was startled to realize that he looked almost like me, except he had darker skin and eyes and his hair curled instead of laying flat. He noticed my approach and sat back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Yo." he said in a tenor voice. His companion's shoulders tensed.

"Yo." I replied amicably, moving to stand beside the pale kid. "Noticed you guys were looking at me."

A grin graced the lips of my almost-doppelganger. "Well, it just so happens that you and your friends were in our line of sight. Can't blame a guy for scoping out possible booty and competition, right, Zeke?"

The pale kid's shoulders tensed even more. "Yeah." He finally said, somewhat strained. "Sure."

I managed to hide my frown as I looked at the pale kid, Zeke. He glanced up at me through black bangs and I thought I saw his eyes narrow a bit as he studied my face. "Something wrong?" I asked.

He jerked and shook his head. "No, nothing." He replied lowly.

He was pointedly trying not to look at me. I wondered why. So I knelt down between him and his friend, braced my arms on the table, and left him no place to turn where he couldn't look at me without seeming extremely rude. I offered my hand to my look-alike. "I'm Dib."

"Desmond." replied my double, shaking my hand. "And my rather silent friend there is Zeke."

I looked over at Zeke and found myself staring into rust-colored eyes. He gave me an uneasy smile. I smiled back.


	7. Chapter 7

**Seven** - Zim POV

My heart was beating so hard that I was sure it'd break through my chest. I started feeling nervous (I hate feeling nervous) the moment I spotted Dib in the cafeteria. There he was, sitting with a male and female I didn't know, laughing with them as if they were old friends. There was something about the male and female, something familiar to me, and something foreign. They weren't human, that much I knew. Their disguises were so much better than mine, though. I don't think they expected anyone to realize what they were. Then again, _I_ didn't want anyone, especially the Dib-beast, to recognize me for what I was, either. And then, just for a moment, Dib and I locked eyes. The joy of realizing he didn't know me was short lived by the fact I hadn't been fully prepared to see him right away. I didn't know what to do except look away and pray he didn't come over. I thought the gods hated me when they made me a defective, but they really showed their hatred when I felt a presence behind me and Desmond said, "Yo." as if he were greeting an old friend.

And then he was crouching there between Desmond and me, no recognition in his eyes whatsoever, introducing himself. Then he looked me straight in the eyes. I smiled, both from the thought that it was appropriate and from the fact he didn't recognize me at all. My disguise worked! I sobered after that if only because I'd have to tell Gaz and I'd owe her something big. And she'd make me deliver, too.

"So," Dib said, focusing on me. "Where are you from?"

"All over." I responded. "My parents are ambassadors, so we moved around a lot." Dib's gaze darkened for a moment. I wondered if he was reminded of his own home life, one where he was ignored by his father unless his father deemed it time for 'family'. "What about you?"

Dib smiled a little. "About three hours away, actually."

I nodded, pretending like I didn't have a clue. In actuality, I wanted to smack the Dib-monkey across the face and yell that his brain must be suffocating from all the space in that overly-large head of his, but I bit my tongue. Literally. This wasn't about the satisfaction of a single moment in time, but the satisfaction of proving to Dib I had been only a few feet away.

"What are you studying?" Dib asked me.

"Huh?"

He smiled as if he knew I'd been daydreaming. It took all my willpower not to blush in embarrassment. "What are you studying?" he asked again.

"Oh. Physics, mostly." I replied. He looked surprised. I reveled in that.

"And you?" He asked Desmond, turning to face him.

"Me? Music." Desmond replied with a grin.

Dib blinked. "Music?"

"Got a problem with that, Dib?"

"No, no. Just… Just is surprising."

"I suppose, if your ego is about as big as your head."

I snorted, trying not to laugh. The look on Dib's face was priceless. Only I had ever told him his head was big, but there was Desmond, smiling way too innocently, delivering the same insult.

"My head is _not_ big." Dib retorted, suddenly standing.

Desmond just kept smiling. "Well, that's your opinion."

Dib scowled. I wanted to laugh so badly. Finally Dib turned to me and smiled. "I guess I'll see you in class."

"Yeah, sure. If I can fit in the room with your head."

Dib scowled at that and stormed off, apparently done trying to make friends with us. Desmond didn't bother to hold back his laughter. I couldn't help but smile. Even if Dib didn't recognize me, I could still make fun of him with my usual insults. It was almost too good to be true. And because I realized that, I knew I had to control myself. If I screwed up and gave away too much, disguise or no disguise, Dib would know me immediately.

"Touchy, isn't he?" Desmond said as we watched Dib sit back down with the two he'd been with before.

I just smiled. "I guess he's the type who prefers to make fun of others and then gets pissed if you make fun of him."

"Yeah, well, he can suck it up and deal with it." Desmond sat back in his chair and poked at his food with his fork. Then he looked at me and smiled. "But he is kind of cute, isn't he?"

I nearly choked on my orange juice. "Cute? Him? Are you insane?"

"Maybe. But I have a feeling he won't even consider batting for the other team. Despite those biceps, I'm sure he's just another geek."

I wanted to narrow my eyes but I just couldn't. The way Desmond's mind worked constantly amazed me. So I settled for smiling at him and saying, "Is it your goal to get punched before the day is over?"

Desmond shrugged. "My mother says I have a filter problem. I don't always think about what I should say, and whether I should say it."

"Oh."

"So it makes life interesting."

"Gives you more enemies than friends."

Desmond grinned. "But that's what makes life interesting, don't you think?"

I didn't know how to respond. I had many enemies and few I could actually call 'friend' and mean it. I had Gaz. I had GIR. Now I had Desmond. Not that he knew what I actually was, and if he did, he'd probably run screaming. But my life, what little of it I had lived, had been filled making enemies no matter what I did or where I went. My own kind thought I was a misfit and sent me into exile. I was listed as an enemy to the whole Irken Armada. Kill on sight. I looked down at my tray and the salad there. Desmond was watching me; I could feel his gaze was concerned. But I also felt he didn't know how to ask if I was all right, and didn't know if I wanted him to ask.

"Let's get out of here." Desmond said at last. "We still have to get our books and explore our classrooms."

"Yeah." I got up after he did and moved after him. I couldn't help one last glance toward Dib, then shivered when he met my gaze with a cold stare. Those black eyes were depthless.


	8. Chapter 8

**Eight** - Dib POV

I glared at Seerah and Lyse when I returned to the table, _daring_ them to say anything about what just happened. I sat down hard and sighed.

"I take it you're enemies instead of friends." Seerah said after a moment.

I folded my arms over my chest and glowered at the girl. "Insults were exchanged, so let's just say I won't be inviting either of them to homecoming."

I dared Seerah to laugh, because what started out as an amused smile was slowly growing into a conspirator's grin. I stared her down until her grin became something more acceptable. I watched Desmond and Zeke get up and start to leave. Zeke caught my gaze again, and we stared at each other for a good five minutes before Zeke hurried after his friend. I propped my head on my fist and frowned. There was something oddly familiar about Zeke. I couldn't put my finger on it, but there was something familiar about him.

"You're staring at that guy awful hard, Dib." Lyse said after a minute. "Are you trying to kill him, or are you trying to imagine something else?"

"Shut up." I growled. "Why do you two have to be such perverts?"

"Because we can be?" Seerah answered with an innocent tone. I just glowered at her. She just smiled at me. "Dib," Seerah started, "try to play nice with the other kids on the playground. You never know, after all. That cute pale kid might be the next unibomber."

"You think he's cute, huh?" I asked quietly.

"Mhm." Seerah replied with a smile. I just shook my head. It wasn't too much time after that that the three of us left to get our books and explore the campus.

When Lyse and I returned to our dorm that night, I decided to indulge in the nosy paranormal investigator side of myself. I called Gaz.

"What?"

"Nice to know I get your love even this far away, Gazline."

"Shut up, Dibeid. What the hell are you bothering me for?"

"What? I can't check up on my baby sister?"

"Asshole, you haven't been gone for more than a day. Besides, I don't even live with you anymore."

I heard crackling in the background. "Are you at home?" I asked.

"Even I get days off, brother dearest." Gaz snapped. "Why? Are you homesick already?"

"No. And you don't even live at Dad's house anymore."

"Doesn't mean I can't visit."

"You? Visit?"

"Strange concept, isn't it?" Her voice lowered into a deadpan. "So what does the almighty genius Dibeid want from the lowly peon Gazline?"

I was silent for a minute. Then I asked in all seriousness, "Would you go check on Zim for me?"

I had a brief, two minute window of utter silence before Gaz burst out laughing. I envisioned her rolling on the floor, clutching her stomach to avoid having some gastric meltdown while she cawed herself hoarse. I waited. And waited. And waited.

"Gaz!" I shouted. "It isn't funny!"

"Yes it is!" she crowed. "Dude, you _left_ to get away from him!"

I felt my cheeks heat. It was the truth after all. I shouldn't be worried about him, shouldn't be checking up on him like we were… together… or anything.

"Gaz," I finally said in aggrieved tone.

"Oh, fine." she said, still giggling now and then. "I'll check on him. Why do you want me to, anyway?"

"Because." I paused. I couldn't very well tell her it was because this kid I had just met reminded me of Zim. She'd latch onto that like a starving dog would to a meaty bone and she'd never let me live it down. But she wouldn't do it unless I gave her a legit reason, or promised her some kind of monetary reward. "Because who knows what kind of trouble he's getting into while I'm not there to curb him." I said at last.

There was silence from her end for a few beats. "Dib," Gaz said finally, "are you sure you're just not feeling guilty for abandoning him like that? I mean, you _are_ friends, right?"

"Who could be friends with that psychotic, deranged freak?"

Gaz just kept her silence then. I figured she was staring at the wall or the ceiling, or some inanimate object, and I could imagine the expression on her face. Finally she said, "Dib, I'll check on him because you asked me to, but just this once. Don't ask me to do it again." Click.

I stared at my phone, realizing dimly she'd hung up on me. Gaz was pissed at me. That in itself was normal, but it was the reason why that shocked me. She was mad at me because Zim was involved.

"Shit," I breathed, rubbing my neck. I returned to my dorm and tossed my phone onto my nightstand.

"Girlfriend trouble?" Lyse asked. He was half-sprawled on his bed, a book about physics open before him.

"More like sister trouble."

"Ah. Well, the easiest thing to do to deal with that is to never piss them off."

"Right." I sat on my bed and rubbed my temples. "You ever piss Seerah off?"

"Oh yeah. Lots of times. She usually beats me to a pulp, if she can get away with it. Otherwise, she makes my life hell for a few days." Lyse sat up and closed his book. "It's better in the long run to never piss off females. They have infinite patience, long memories, and can be totally psychotic at any given time."

"Perfect predators, huh?"

"Yeah," Lyse shrugged. "But, you know, it all works itself out in the end."

I just shrugged in reply and flopped back on my bed. If Gaz called back and said Zim was just fine, doing some weird experiment on spam and its effects as sunscreen or whatever, I guess I didn't have to worry. But if she called back and said Zim was missing… well, I'd have to figure out something to do then. Which meant taking a long hard look at that Zeke kid. Of course, that was _if_ Gaz called me back, which she wouldn't if she thought I was being a total tool. It would be a sign of her contempt for me and my behavior.

Nothing left to do but sit and wait, I sat up and grabbed my computer, intending to memorize my classrooms. It didn't do anything to solve my growing anxiety that something was definitely not right here. I just couldn't figure out what it was.


	9. Chapter 9

**Nine** - Zim POV

I was startled by a low buzzing noise coming from under my bed. I must've jumped at least four feet in the air, because I landed awkwardly on my side and let out a sound that was a mix between a groan and a cry of pain. Thankfully, Desmond wasn't around to see me do it. He'd gone off to see about getting a snack or something, so I was alone. After we'd returned to our dorm, exhausted from walking the campus with heavy plastic bags full of the books we'd need for our classes, I'd decided to take a nap. Normally, Irkens don't sleep, due to having extra energy stored in the PAK from simple kinetic movement. But since I'd detached my PAK, I didn't have that energy to rely on. So I needed sleep, and I figured if I didn't at least pretend, Desmond would ask why I was pulling all-nighters. I couldn't wear my PAK around anyone who didn't know my secret - and I especially couldn't wear it around Dib.

The buzzing continued and I realized someone was trying to contact me. It had been Gaz who had introduced me to the concept of cell phones. I didn't have one of the devices myself - I was sure Dib would've used it to bring the human government down on my head - but I had created the next best thing.

For me, anyway.

I reached for my PAK and pulled it out from under the bed. As I suspected, a small section of my PAK had grown warm from the vibrations. A deft touch and the section popped out from the main body with a soft hiss. It was a small device, much akin to those bluetooth headsets stupid humans use to claim they're hands-free while driving. The difference in mine was that my little device created a holographic image of the person who held the sister device to mine. And only one person had that device.

Gaz appeared in my room. "Took you long enough." she griped.

"Whatever. What do you want?"

"Aren't we grumpy?"

"These aren't made for social calls." I growled.

"No shit. Do you really believe I'm the kind of person to bother you with my sniffles and boohoos?" I just glowered at her. Gaze me a superior smirk. "Dib called me."

Now I just stared at her. "So?" I asked finally. "What for?" I felt my heart give a little jump.

"Why? Scared?" I glared at her but stayed quiet. Her smirk became a more genuine smile. "He asked me to check up on you."

I huffed. "I'm sure it wasn't out of the kindness of his black heart."

"No. But you definitely seem to have made an impression. I just wanted to make sure you didn't blow your cover."

"I'm not _that_ stupid."

Gaz gave me a look that clearly stated her opinion about my intelligence. I looked away. I heard her sigh. "Look, Zim, I have the utmost confidence that you can pull this off. I also have the utmost confidence that Dib has an unhealthy habit of becoming consumed by his paranoia. You're the one who's gonna have to be at the top of his game."

"And what are you going to tell him?"

Gaz shrugged. "I dunno. Maybe I'll tell him you got lonely and we're watching monster movies on the Sci Fi channel."

I snorted. "He'd never believe that."

"I'll come up with something." Gaz assured. "So you don't worry about it."

"Who says I'm worried?"

She just smirked at me. "Good bye, Zim."

"..." I didn't grace her with a farewell. I simply disconnected my device. Her holographic image fizzled out and I was left alone. I clenched my fists.

Dib, the bastard, had called his _sister_ to check up on _me._ Instead of doing it himself. I wasn't quite sure how to feel about that except to feel pissed off at the stupid human. But then, I also felt relieved that he had chosen to call Gaz. I didn't know what I would've done if Dib had decided to take a quick trip home and knocked on my front door. It would be no doubt disastrous. But, if I wanted to keep this charade up, I had to trust Gaz. Too bad trust was such a hard thing for me to believe in.


	10. Chapter 10

**Ten** - Dib POV

The first day of class is always rough, whether you're a kindergartner spending your first whole day away from mommy or a third year med student who happens to forget you're scheduled for clinical hours before class. My first class happened to be physics, and there sitting in the second row from the front left was the black-haired kid I'd met the other day, the one called Zeke. He had his head propped on a closed fist and was staring at an open textbook on the table in front of him. I didn't see any sign of his friend, and I didn't see Lyse either. I didn't want to sit all the way in the back, which meant the only free seats I could choose from were in the very first row, or next to Zeke.

Giving in, I let out a long sigh and moved over to Zeke. He glanced up at me, and I swore he froze. "This seat free?" I asked, trying to be polite and not give in to my paranoia that maybe I knew this guy from somewhere.

Slowly, Zeke nodded, and quickly returned his gaze to the book in front of him. I sat down, pulling out my own textbook and laptop. I lanced over at him. "Are you okay?" I asked.

He looked at me. "Yeah. Why?"

"You seem a little pale."

"I'm always pale." Zeke said dryly. "I don't tan. I burn."

"You sound like my sister." I griped quietly.

Zeke just stared at me, like he wanted to say something. His reddish-blue eyes seemed focused on my face, but after a minute he averted his gaze back to the page in front of him.

"You're not very social, are you?" I asked.

"In what context?" Zeke asked. "Am I not social in the fact we're not holding a legitimate conversation, or not social in that I come across as a lonely kid who really wants friends but bites off the extended hand and drives everyone away?"

I blinked at him, unsure of how to respond. Finally, I shrugged.

He actually smirked a little. Then, almost hesitantly, he said, "Most people think I'm weird, so they don't even bother to get to know me."

"I know the feeling." I replied. He looked at me, studying my face.

Something about that studying gaze bothered me. I knew I had seen it somewhere before, but I couldn't really place it. At least I knew this kid wasn't Zim. Gaz had finally called me back early this morning and told me Zim was sulking and bored but otherwise fine. She said she'd check up on him again if I ever felt the urge to make sure my little alien boyfriend (I wanted to punch her for that one) wasn't wasting away due to inattention. I suppose it was my fault in a way - I'd just up and left Zim so I could continue with my own life, trying to make something of myself, while he was essentially exiled, abandoned by his own people to live on a planet full of people who'd sooner dissect him than live peacefully alongside him. In a weird way, I think I was Zim's only friend for a long time.

"If you stare at the screen any harder, your psychic powers may kick in."

I blinked and leaned back to look at Zeke. He was watching me with that familiar studying gaze, like I was a math problem he was determined to solve.

"Not possible." I said. "I was ten when I learned I don't have psychic powers."

Zeke made a humming noise and turned back to his book.

After role call and an ice breaker game (which didn't go very well since Zeke froze up when it was his turn to introduce himself) we got down to the day's first lesson. It was a simple lecture, easing us into the wonderful world of physics. Zeke was more entertaining to watch than the professor was. He was only listening for the sake of being polite, I figured, judging by the expression on his face. Every once in a while, he'd glance down at his book and try to quietly turn a page.

I waited until the professor gave us a few physics problems to do before I leaned over and asked, "If you already know so much, why are you taking this class?"

Zeke tensed and looked at me. His reaction wasn't really what I'd been expecting, but then _he_ wasn't exactly what I'd expected him to be. "It's not that I know it already." Zeke replied quietly. "It's that I've always had to figure it out on my own. I've never had anyone explain it to me."

"Really? What'd you do in high school then?"

"I didn't go to high school."

"Everyone goes to high school." I said.

"Not me."

"Were you home-schooled or something?"

"Yeah." he said a little too quickly. It spiked my paranoia. "My parents are ambassadors. I always had tutors."

My paranoia was still baring its sharp teeth, but I couldn't call Zeke on his story. It was plausible. Besides, I didn't think a high school dropout would make it into a class like this. I propped my head on my fist. "Were they like doctors in their fields or something?"

"No. I... I have a hard time making friends. Move around too much to make any solid connections. So I read."

"Read? What about the internet?"

"You can't trust anything on the internet." I wanted to laugh, but somehow I kept it to a minimal grin. He smiled back at me and shrugged. "The tutors were always pissed that I seemed to know more than they did. So my parents finally decided to let me go to a real college."

"And get some human interaction with people your own age, huh?"

"I guess. It was my choice to come here. They probably felt a private college would be better."

"Well, you have to disappoint them somehow, right?" I said, grinning.

Zeke gave a wan smile in return. "I dunno. I'm pretty good at being a disappointment."


	11. Chapter 11

**Eleven** - Zim POV

I wondered how I got so good at lying.

Maybe I was so good at it because I'd been lying to myself for years now. I lied to myself when I was young, thinking I was some great invader when I was really a defective; I lied to myself when I thought I could get along just fine on my own, that I didn't need anyone; and, finally, I realized I'd lied to myself and Gaz when I said that my being here was to throw Dib's ignorance back into his face. The truth was, despite my time in elementary school, I knew nothing about this planet and anything I did know I learned due to my own curiosity and from the Membrane siblings.

And... And... And I didn't want to be alone.

I didn't exactly have the most cordial relationship with Dib and I wouldn't dare refuse Gaz's friendship if I wanted to stay whole and healthy, but those two were the only humans I knew and remotely trusted. And Dib...

I wanted to close my eyes when my heart suddenly felt like it was being squeezed, but somehow managed not to. Dib was explaining to me about some mechanic of the problems we were working on, and I didn't need him pressing me for more information. When I saw him walk into class earlier, I was almost praying he sat anywhere else but near me. And of course, the humans' god hated me, as all gods, both foreign and domestic, did.

"So what do you think?" Dib asked, taping his pencil against the math on the paper.

I studied it, trying to keep my face neutral. Dib has such horrible handwriting... "Looks right." I said finally.

"Looks right?" Dib asked.

"Well, you did it the long way, but yeah."

"Is there a shorter way?"

Dib, you're always proclaiming you're smarter than me, so why are you being so stupid? I wished I could say it, but I didn't want to ruin this opportunity I had now. So I picked up my pencil and showed Dib the other way to solve the physics problem.

"Huh." Dib said after I was done. "You know. You're pretty smart."

There was an odd flutter in my chest. I quickly squashed the feeling. It wasn't Zim Dib was calling smart; it was Zeke. I felt like I wasn't even me anymore. I was just pretending so I could lord it over him later. But... I was beginning to have second thoughts. I never cared much to learn about the planet I'd been sent to. I'd only ever thought about conquering it in the name of the Tallest and the irken race. But the longer I lived here, the more I experienced, the more I realized conquering this planet would be a stupid and foolish endeavor. I could live here for years, right under the noses of the people who spent their lives chasing creatures like me, and keep a relatively peaceful life. With my skills, there was no reason I couldn't live comfortably.

But...

I looked at Dib and frowned a little. But the true question I faced was whether or not I could live alone.

"So, Zeke," Dib said, startling me out of my thoughts. "What class do you have next?"

"Ancient history," I replied.

"After that?"

"I have a two hour break. I figured I'd go somewhere and do some work."

Dib nodded. "Well, if you meet me at the dining hall, we could work on the physics together."

I blinked, then gave a little nod. "Yeah, sure. When?"

"After your history class. I have a science lab, but it won't take too long, I don't think." I just nodded. Dib gave me a large grin. "Great! I'll see you then."

"Okay." I just stared at him, not quite sure how to react. Dib didn't seem to be bothered by my lack of reaction.

After class, we went out separate ways, and I could swear I was being watched as I walked down the hall and down the stairs, out of sight.


	12. Chapter 12

**Twelve** - Zim POV

I was going to have to call Gaz at some point and ask her why she thought ancient history would be something I wanted to learn. Sure, learning about the origins of humanity was great and all, but it just reinforced the fact humans were dumb hairless apes and were quite less civilized than said apes.

I was pretty sure I'd already learned this through the years I was going through the motions of being an adolescent human. I was thankful to have a seat in the back of the lecture hall. It allowed me to pay less attention to the professor and more attention to the young woman who'd been with Dib in the cafeteria a few days ago. I'd already discerned she wasn't human. I couldn't place what she was. I'd never encountered anything like her before. Her disguise was better than mine by far. Which meant she'd had time to plan this.

She wasn't an Irken. I knew that much for certain. And she wasn't any of the species the Irkens had conquered. She definitely knew how to act more human than I did, and she definitely knew more than I did about not drawing attention to herself. She turned just slightly, just enough to glance at me and frown. I ducked my head and averted my gaze. It was too late to do anything except try to look sheepish about staring at her, and pray that she didn't recognize me as anything but human. She tilted her head and gave me a small smile before she returned her attention to the professor.

That smile bothered me. It bothered me so badly I had to dig my nails into the skin on my legs in order to keep from exploding in front of everyone. In elementary school, no one really cared when I had an outburst. They simply said I was weird and left it at that. But here? Here that would be a red flag, especially to Dib, that I wasn't normal. That I wasn't who I said I was. That I wasn't human.

I felt my face starting to burn and ducked my head.

As soon as the professor declared class over, I tried to get out of there as fast as I could.

"Zeke, right? Or should I say, Irken invader?"

I whirled around and faced her. She was staring at me, her eyes deadly serious. Her hands were clasped behind her back. Or maybe they were hiding a weapon. Slowly I raised my hands above my head as I'd seen humans do when a weapon was pointed their way.

She cocked her head, her lips turning into a frown. "What are you doing here, Irken?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?"

"You're not honestly here getting an education, are you?" she sounded surprised. Even a little confused.

"And if I am?"

She pursed her lips and frowned even more. "That's strange. For your kind."

"My kind?" God, she made it sound like I was some sort of unmentionable. _That kind._ What the hell did she think she was?

The woman snickered. "You're kinda cute when you get mad."

I felt my face heat. "Shut up."

She canted her head to the side, and sucked in a breath to sigh. "Now I remember you. You were that kid Dib went to go talk to the day before classes started."

"So?" I asked defensively. I wondered how fast I could move. If I could reach her before she shot me or managed to scream. Of course, she was taller than me, so I'd probably be at a disadvantage that way, but I could probably break a rib or two if I hit her in the right place. Then I'd just have to quietly dispose of her body and no one would be the wiser.

"Before you decide in favor of whatever suicidal mission you're thinking of, please allow me to explain that I am not alone here. And if I disappear, my people will find you and eradicate the entire Irken Armada down to the tiniest smeet."

I stared at her. Her face was dead serious, and her inflection left no room for doubt. She smiled at me, displaying sharp canine teeth. "Now, does the human know what you are?"

"Does he know what you are?" I countered.

"Humans are easy to fool. If you look human, you are human."

"Great diplomatic answer, but completely evasive."

To my surprise, she laughed. "I like you, Irken."

"My name is Zim." I snapped.

"Zim, huh?" She let her hands fall to her sides and in her left I saw a black matter sphere. I tried not to let any fear show on my face. I didn't know how she could get her hands on such a dangerous weapon, but she definitely was willing to use it. One little tap from the sphere and whoosh - you were gone. I remembered to breathe only after she slid the black matter sphere into a little pouch and put the pouch in her satchel. "Doesn't Zim stand for-"

"Say it and I'll kill you." I growled.

Her smile was dangerous and just shy of deadly. "You could try."

I clenched my fists and spun on my heel, stomping away. I heard her footsteps behind me, and a moment later she was walking beside me.

"Sorry," she said. "I didn't mean to piss you off."

I stopped and stared at her. She fluffed her hair and sighed. "I suppose it's innate, for my people, to hate Irkens."

"I think the whole galaxy hates Irkens." I muttered. "So what are you?"

She tapped her fingers against her lips. "I'm Puuraki."

"Never heard of it."

"I'm not surprised. We're very... what's the word... exclusionist. But it's ingrained in our DNA to hate Irkens and usually destroy them on sight."

"Gee, thanks for your incredible self-control." I said dryly. But her statement confused me as much as I understood it. I'd never heard of the Puuraki, and there was definitely no mention of the race in the Irken database, otherwise the Armada would've taken them out already. So there was something I'd have to look into, something I had to validate. The problem was I didn't have access to my mother computer and I wasn't about to ask GIR to do research for me. Not that I believed he wasn't capable, but I didn't want anyone, especially this girl, to know what I was up to.

"You're a defective, aren't you?"

I glowered and said nothing.

She nodded. "That's probably why I like you. The first Irken to ever throw off the chains of his people and do what he wanted."

"I'm not the first." I said. "I"m just the only one to survive. Wait. Why am I telling you this? Just leave me alone!"

She laughed. "You can call me Seerah, Zim."

"It's Zeke. Could you call me Zeke? Zim is... No one's supposed to know that!"

"...No one meaning Dib?"

I froze. She stared at me, and I felt something dangerous peering at me from behind her eyes. I met her gaze with a cold stare. "So what?"

She moved so fast I didn't realize what she was doing until the back of my head hit the wall and her hand wrapped tight around my throat. "So what?" she growled. "You little bastard. And here I thought I _liked_ you! But the apple doesn't fall far from the tree does it? You're planning something aren't you? And Dib's part of it? Are you aiming to earn his trust and then turn around and destroy him?"

I choked and grabbed her wrist. She was strong, stronger than me, and she didn't even look it. "No," I managed to gasp out. "He... I... grew up together, but..."

Her hand eased up on my throat but she didn't let go. "But?" Seerah asked with deadly calm.

"But he left me behind. He came here and forgot about me. So I came here, pretending to be human, with his little sister's help, to show him I can be just as good as him. That I can be human too. That I can do anything he can so we don't have to be apart." The words came out in a rush. My eyes were blurry. I couldn't tell if it was because I was suffocating or I was crying. I don't think I even really knew what I was saying.

Suddenly, Seerah's hand left my throat. "Oh. Oh, Zim."

I slid to the linoleum floor, gasping for air and trying to hide my head in my arms. I felt ashamed and I hated myself. I'd just basically detailed my entire reason for being here to someone I didn't even know, someone who'd tried to kill me in defense of Dib of all people. I looked up when her hand touched my hair.

Her eyes were kind, and a small smile graced her lips. "You love him, don't you?"

"What? No, no!" I said quickly. "Who'd love that big-headed science freak? Not me! I'm here to prove he will never know whether or not I'm nearby."

"Liar." Seerah said with a snort. "But keep telling yourself whatever excuse you want to. I know the truth." She rose and started to walk away.

I jumped up and ran after her. I caught up to her outside the building and grabbed her wrist. I yanked hard enough to stop her and pull her off balance. Seerah gasped and spun around, grabbing onto me so she didn't fall down. Of course, if she did, she'd be taking me with her.

"You can't tell Dib." I said perhaps a little to desperately.

She stared at me, and at first I thought she was going to break my neck because I'd touched her. Then she straightened and gave me a smile that I guess was supposed to be reassuring, but it just served to unnerve me. "I won't tell him about your little plan or your crush. And you can't tell him about me, kapeesh?"

"Fine." I released Seerah and stepped away from her. "I promise."

"Alright, then."

We stared at each other for a moment longer, and then started to go our separate ways. Which happened to be toward the dining hall.

"Would you quit following me?" Seerah said.

"I'm not following you." I snapped. "I'm meeting someone."

"So am I."

We glowered at each other until we reached the dining hall. Seerah immediately bee-lined for a table, the table Dib happened to be sitting at, along with another boy. Another Puuraki. Seerah hugged the other Puuraki and smiled sweetly at Dib. Then she casually pointed at me. I should've retreated, but I didn't want to leave, not really trusting Seerah to keep her promise. So I took a deep breath and approached the table.


	13. Chapter 13

**Thirteen** - Dib POV

I watched Zeke approach me with a look on his face that said he probably would've rather run away somewhere. Since Seerah gave him a brilliant smile when he sat down next to me, I figured his look was justified.

"You know each other?" I asked.

Seerah fluffed her hair. "We have a class together."

Zeke stared at the table's surface before he looked up at Seerah. "She sits in front of me."

I looked at Seerah, then to Zeke, then to Seerah again. "Did you traumatize him somehow?"

Seerah blinked. "Me? No way."

"You know, he's not used to people." I said.

"Is that right?" Seerah looked at Zeke and smiled. "Well, I'm sorry if I traumatized you in class."

Zeke mumbled something and promptly turned to start digging in his backpack. I watched him, wondering if he was going to be one of those types to seek revenge for being slighted. Instead he pulled out his physics textbook and slammed it on the table. Then he looked up at me through his bangs. "We're doing our work now."

I just stared at him for a moment, wondering why my heart suddenly skipped a beat and a flash of cold went through my blood. Maybe it was the way Zeke was looking at me. Maybe it was the way he'd practically issued an order. But, damn it, I _knew_ him from somewhere. So I said, "Zim?" in a quiet voice.

Zeke blinked slowly and stared at me with an increasing frown. "No." he said. "Zeke. Who the hell is Zim?"

"Ah, uh, never mind."

"Look, if you really don't want to do the work, just say so. You're the one who suggested it in the first place." Zeke stuffed his book back into his satchel and abruptly rose. "I'm leaving."

I rose after him saying, "Wait! Wait, I didn't mean it like that!"

He paused and looked at me. "Then what _did_ you mean?"

I froze, and stared at the blurry image of Zeke. I pushed my glasses back up and saw his expression quickly change. I couldn't make heads or tails of it, but my gut said that he almost looked relieved. Again the little voice in the back of my head began to chatter, dredging up all kinds of reasons as to why Zeke could look relieved.

Before I could say anything, Seerah sighed gustily. "God, Dib, how can you be so insensitive?" she asked. "Isn't Zeke supposed to be your friend? You're the one who said he doesn't make friends easy."

I felt heat in my cheeks. I looked at Zeke, and found him staring at the floor as if it were something about to eat him. "Zeke," I said. I rubbed the back of my neck. He slowly raised his head and looked up at me. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" he asked so quietly it was almost like he hadn't said anything at all.

"Yeah, I'm... I'm really sorry. I just..."

"Forget it," Zeke said. "I get it. You're paranoid."

"I am not paranoid." I retorted.

"Dib, for Christ's sake." Seerah said. "You need to freaking relax." She rose from the table and walked over to Zeke. She put a hand on his shoulder and then glowered at me. "Are you, or are you not, going to be able to study with Zeke?"

I gaped. "What's that got to do with anything?"

"Zeke's got a point, Dib. You're the one who promised to work with him right now. You're the one who decided Zeke was whoever this Zim was. You're the one who's been paranoid that there's someone watching you. You can't just go around pointing fingers and crying wolf as you please."

"Wait. I already apologized, why are you lecturing me?"

"Because you're male, and therefore need to have things explained to you multiple times before you understand it."

I blinked. "Hey," I trailed off, frowning at the insult. "Zeke's male too."

"Dude," Lyse spoke suddenly, "just take the kick in the balls and apologize profusely. Once she's got her mind made up, nothing you say will change it."

I stared at Lyse and then sighed heavily. "Alright, alright. I'm _sor-ry_. I'm sorry for being such an idiot. Zeke, come on. I promised you. Don't make me look like even more of an asshole."

"You don't need any help from me." Zeke whispered softly enough I barely heard him. But he stepped back toward the table and sat down.

Seerah followed shortly after him. I rubbed the back of my neck and took my seat again. "All right," I said to Zeke. "Let's get started."


	14. Chapter 14

**Fourteen **- Zim POV

I was sure my cover had been blown the moment Dib looked at me and said my name in a very confused tone. It took all my will power, and perhaps more luck than was my fair share, to not react the way he wanted. The hurt act wasn't all feigned, but I knew if I didn't get out of there, I'd really be in some deep shit. If it hadn't been for Seerah jumping to my defense (which scared me a bit, because I was sure there was some ulterior motive for it) I might not have been able to continue my charade as a human.

But she did save me, and because of it there was no way I could graciously bow out of this stupid little meeting without a) blowing my cover and b) seeming like a selfish moron. It didn't seem like I was going to escape, especially now that I wanted to. Seerah smiled sweetly at me. I returned her smile with a sour look. I quickly erased it when Dib leaned closer to me, sucking in a breath like he was going to say something. Instead, he let out a soft sigh and propped his head on his fist. I stared at him for a moment, then turned my attention to our work and started the first problem.

It felt funny, working beside Dib as I was. After all these years spent fighting one another, I didn't think we _could_ work together. Of course, if he knew who I really was, I doubt I'd make it out of here in one piece. But I didn't start this farce with the intention of being caught within the first few weeks. I wanted Dib to realize who I was after enough time had passed that he'd kick himself for not pursuing the thought that Zeke might not be who he said he was. And, at the same time... I was having fun. I flicked a glance to Seerah. The Puuraki was happily crunching on a carrot stick as she watched Dib and me, but I could see some sort of satisfaction in her expression. Our two races might have the kill-on-sight rule, but she was here to have fun too. I still needed to do research on her kind, her and the boy Lyse as well, but for now...

I looked to the human sitting by my side, studying the work I'd done for our homework. For now I had to concentrate on Dib. I had to make sure he didn't discover who I was. I had to make sure he didn't leave campus without my knowledge. I needed to know how he really felt about me.

My thoughts stuttered to a halt. ...I needed to know how he really felt about me? What was I? A lovesick schoolgirl? My squeedlyspooch began to churn, like I was about to be sick. I felt as though all my blood was draining from my head.

"Zeke?" Seerah's voice.

I focused on her, saw her eyes go wide. I really wasn't sure what happened then, but I was pretty sure my world world went upside down, and I thought I heard Dib calling my name. But that wasn't right, because my name was Zim. Not Zeke.


End file.
